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description of life in my eyes.

i think im expressing my mind in a bad way, maybe i should express it better cause it rubs people the wrong way , the way i express myself so bluntly. So, im just gonna sit there and try to do better in therapy this week to really be better with communication cause sometimes i really have alot to say and i dont say it because of the fear of being judged by my therapist but i could always just give it a try. i wont lose or win in this scenario so i guess i could try.  i mean shes a therapist , why wouldn’t she be less judgemental? due to the fact that shes a therapist i guess just gives me the idea of this person that really cares about your well being, but sometimes i feel as though nobody gives a flying shit about me. ive got DBT after this, #nothappy. DBT is dialectical behavior therapy. i hate it times 10000. It drives my fucking crazy. uh well, just have to deal with it only for a couple more months . wish me luck on my experiment, i will get back to you. 

so yeah, speaking my mind gets me no where. id rather just stay quiet. i can be invisible and get away with shit easier. but it really had a bad effect on my experiment (trying to speak up) cause nobody wanted to hear the shit that goes on in my crazy ass mind. so im just gonna keep quiet. since my relationship almost ended today. i cant afford to lose him. i love him way to much to lose my babe. i can always speak my mind with him, its just that sometimes i can be brutally honest and it comes off as rude sometimes. so i have to watch that. 

this week im going to speak my mind, more often and see how others respond. According to my family, i hold my tongue too much, so im gonna try to change that cause i believe everyone’s opinion matters. Except for judgmental comments . 

i am slowly becoming a dupstep fan. lol. its amazing. i love it. i never really liked it before. but to be honest (and this is embarrassing :p) , my dad got me into it. lol. its awesome though , i love dancing , i love singing, i love music. So dubstep just rocks my socks! 

love, bri

Zaman Tüneli Fotoğrafları | via Facebook on We Heart It. http://weheartit.com/entry/70984391/via/zeynepakbas

Zaman Tüneli Fotoğrafları | via Facebook on We Heart It. http://weheartit.com/entry/70984391/via/zeynepakbas

i love you so much . You put the colors inside of my world. Without you everything is gray and dull, with you its beautiful. Im so glad our 2 months is coming up <3 usually wouldnt feel like this after 2 months but i like him alot , its so hard to be faithful sometimes though but i still love him all the same. i will remain faithful to you forever . I love you, dont ever change. 

Love, Bri 

i will stay christian, because that is what ive been taught and that is what i know in my heart. But i think that I’m not as judgmental as i use to be about religious things. I use to be really upset when others didnt believe what i believed. but as a bi sexual and a christian. i believe i am alot more open minded then most christian’s . i love my faith and i love my community of being gay but i think that its okay as long as your a good person, nothing really changes. were all human at the end of the day,. bri out !